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Paying the price of love

Art: Nathan Barnes

In the ever-changing world of teen romance the simple question of who should pay at the end of a date is continuing to challenge the old norms. 


The days when the answer to this question was given are farther and farther in the past with each passing day. The teens in today’s society are navigating new views of equality and expectations everyday.


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“They shouldn’t feel forced to pay for everything because the lady doesn’t want to,” Bri Rasdon, freshman, said.


Since women primarily used to stay at home during the day, they didn’t always have jobs to go make money. This is where the idea that the man should pay came from. 


If a woman didn’t have a job, and men made the money for the household, how were the women expected to pay for anything?

“The guy should be the one who asks the other out and whoever asks for the date to happen should pay for the date,” Bailey Wright, 8, said.

Many teens and young adults in recent years are more likely to be open to the idea of splitting the bill on dates and even in some situations the woman paying for the whole thing. This showcases how gender roles are becoming more and more obsolete.

“I think sometimes the guy should be willing to let the girl do something gentleman-like for them so they know how it feels,” Annabelle Tappe, freshman, said.

Splitting the bill doesn’t put all of the responsibility on any one person in the relationship and allows everyone to be held accountable for part of the date. 


In a recent poll, 207  students were asked who they thought should pay on a date. 56% said the guy, 5% said the girl, and 39% said other. 


When asked what they meant by other most explained that the bill should be split 50/50 or whoever asked for the date should pay.


However, some did mention the fact that there are some non-hetero relationships. 


In these relationships there may not be a specific person in the male or female role so these standards simply don’t apply.


“I believe that both should pay, if the guy asked out the girl he should pay since he is taking her out but it works both ways. If she gets treated like a ‘queen’ shouldn’t he be treated like a ‘king’,” Cassey Boling, freshman, said. 


While more people may be open to the idea of the women paying or splitting the bill now, there are still plenty that think that the guy should be paying.


“The guy should pay because they need to always be a gentleman,” Noah Akers, freshman, said. 


But this isn’t the only reason that people may still want the guy to pay, sometimes the topic just doesn’t come up and if it does it can make the conversation a little awkward. 


In many cases it is the guy that asks the girl out, takes her somewhere nice to eat, buys her flowers and holds open the door. These things can all be seen as a stereotypical date. 


But asking someone out takes a lot of courage, so why would someone want to take on the added stress of asking a girl to pay rather than just taking the bill?


“I think the guy should pay because I feel like it is just weird for me to say the girl should pay as a guy,” Talan Montgomery, freshman, said. 


While making sure that you are both putting effort into the relationship and making a point to go spend time with each other on dates is very important, sometimes that isn’t the only thing that matters.


“In a relationship, money isn’t the most important because being in love and having that special feeling for someone is cherishing and very special,” Summer Chang, freshman, said.

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Xoe Hawkins
Xoe Hawkins, coEditor-in-Chief- The Occurrence
Meet Xoe Hawkins, a 9th grade Newspaper Co Editor in chief, who enjoys her time in choir. She loves to sing, and to be involved in theater. She’s also on the archery team, and loves to compete. She hopes to become an education teacher when she grows older.
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Comments (7)

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  • P

    PaolaMay 2, 2024 at 10:28 am

    I feel like most people would say after reading this article they realized that both men and women can pay for the date. But if they were to be honest with themselves everyone already knows that it won’t always be one person paying for the date in every case scenario for the most part. The strongest part in this article I would have the say is when you explained how the opinion of “men paying on dates” started because women didn’t work as much as men did and it just tied the knot in your article. I did notice that the only people that you interviewed were students it would have been nice to hear from some teachers/adults and their opinions on this, since they most likely have more experience with dates and money than any student.

  • L

    LailaApr 10, 2024 at 7:51 pm

    I learned that not all people thinks the guy should have to pay
    The strongest and most interesting part of this article is the poll showing how many people thought that the boy should pay how many people thought that the bill should be split and how many people thought that the girl should pay
    A suggestion I have is having more males answer This question
    No questions are unanswered

  • C

    CasseyMar 31, 2024 at 11:48 pm

    The article shows many different peoples opinions. Although many may not agree to the topic I believe the question isn’t fully answered and that it can only be answered on your own. With a new society and cultural norms it is hard to stick with the old or decide on the new and I think this article did a great job of showing. It.

  • E

    EvelinMar 29, 2024 at 11:45 am

    Reading this article made me learn how different people think when it comes to paying and how most people think men are dependent on paying the bill. It is interesting seeing peoples point of views on this situation. I wish there were more of peoples view points that are quoted in the article to see peoples opinion. suggestions for a future article like this is seeing how half of girls think about it and how have of boys think about it.

  • A

    AshleyMar 7, 2024 at 10:04 am

    After reading this article I got the background story and what made it the normal for men to buy everything. I enjoy seeing it put into a different light. I do wish there was a couple male viewpoints in order to hear their opinion on the matter. For future reference, you could do one just based on the guys perspective and what they believe is the right way to go about things.

  • M

    MiaMar 7, 2024 at 9:55 am

    This aritical has helped me get to an understanding of that many people have way different opinions on who should pay. And that there isn’t just one right answer in many peoples eyes. One of the things that caught my eye was that in the same sex or non-binary relationships it may not be like a stereotypical kind of date. It was a very good article with showing how there are many different points of views of paying for a date, I think I would’ve liked to hear your thoughts on it too.

  • T

    TaylorMar 6, 2024 at 2:50 pm

    This article made me understand that the guy does not always have to pay, and it made me see that there are different ways to pay for a date night. I actually like the idea of putting the responsibility of paying on the person who initiated the date, or just splitting the bill 50/50. I would’ve liked to see more of a gender dependent pole. I want to know how most guys think and how most girls think, to really compare the two. This was a very good article, I might just add a couple more student responses.